Andrew's Mess

I’ve been a Christian for 2.5 years now.  So a later in life Christian for sure.  I remember the exact moment I finally saw God welcoming me.  I’m sure there were plenty of missed opportunities before that.  I had just gotten divorced and I was a divorced father of 3 little ones. I was just lost, living alone in an apartment.  Drinking more than I needed to.  And even more so I was a director at a rehab company, making decisions for profits sake, and not for the benefit of the patients or the staff I managed.  Just truly misguided and unhappy.

So I was working out at a planet fitness at 5 am.   Just going through the motions.  Zombie like.  And I’ve had Christian friends before and for whatever reason I felt compelled to read the bible at that very moment.  So I searched through the App Store at the gym and came across the you version Bible app.  Went straight to the verse of the day and I read Corinthians 13:4-8.  The love is patient, love is kind verses.  And man was I overwhelmed with emotions.  Truthfully can’t remember if I cried or what but it just felt like a veil was lifted.  Like a realization that I have been doing this all wrong my whole life.  That there was more than my circumstances.  That it was time for a fresh start as a believer, as a saved Christian man.  So I made the decision to leave my job, to move, and to start again. 

And it’s not like that was that.  It’s still a push, it’s still a struggle.  To let go of the flesh.  The feelings of pride, selfishness, anger, guilt, shame.  Those emotions are very real.  But now I have a reason to really push to let go of those feelings.  A higher purpose.  To please the Father because those emotions will hold me back from my true calling.  They hold me back from being who God has designed me to be.

And looking back… what a mess I left behind.  A divorced father of 3 leaving town and quitting a high paying job to move to Florida?  But through Gods grace I’m still here.  Through Gods grace I have a higher purpose.  Through His grace I’m with Gretchel and we have this calling with Katie to further His Word and help others through A Perfect Mess.

God meets you in your mess.  And I feel he’s always ready for you to come to Him, if you’re willing to accept Him.